The Goodwill Bag

[Fred Garvin]

OK I think I posted this a year or so ago... maybe it was here maybe it wasn't... but fish reminded me of it so I figured I'd share it with you all...

The Goodwill Bag
It was Halloween and I was about 5 or 6 years old, my brother, 10 months younger (don't ask!... fish... NOT A WORD! LOL). My mother usually made our costumes and was great at it. We were ALWAYS the talk of the neighborhood this time of year. But this year in particular, my mom in her infinite wisdom, decided to let my sister, who is now a renowned artist, try her hand at her craft by designing my costume. I was her canvas and the world was her pallet. Why the hell she chose what she did is still a mystery.

My brother was a scarecrow. And not just ANY scarecrow… he looked like he had just walked off the set of “The Wizard of OZ.” He was perfect. Me? Well that is where the story takes a terribly twisted turn for the artistic worst.

So what do you think my sister created for me? I WAS THE FREAKING GOODWILL BAG! LITERALLY!!! She took a goodwill bag, cut some holes in it, put some rags in the holes, and there I was... the freaking Goodwill bag. My brother was a scarecrow and a great one at that… I on the other hand was the anti-Christ of Halloween… I was EVERYTHING that Halloween wasn’t… I was the Goodwill Bag.

So we all go from house to house... and at every house the same thing...

"Tricks or Treats!" "My what lovely costumes! Why I see a scarecrow, and Batman, and a cowboy, and a princess... and a.... well... uuummmm.... errrr… ahem… well… and what might you be little boy?"
Embarrassed and humiliated… but not to the point that would squander my chance at sympathy Halloween candy, I mumbled, "I'm the goodwill bag."

Every freakin’ house the same thing! I WAS THAT YEAR’S CHARLIE BROWN!!!!

And people wonder why I've needed the years of therapy I've received! ;) LMAO.

Oh... and for those who don't believe me... I've included a photo.

[RAN-MAN]

Lmaorotf, but you do spread good will these days Fred.

[twnpnds]

OMG that is hilarious! LMAO!!! Thanks Fred. Hmmm, maybe we should have a "my most embarrassing moment" thread.

[Fred Garvin]

Originally Posted by twnpnds

OMG that is hilarious! LMAO!!! Thanks Fred. Hmmm, maybe we should have a "my most embarrassing moment" thread.

He he he... thanks... I think! LMAO

I have to tell you... when my mother was on her death bed, she was starving herself due to a terminal illness and we - my sister, brother, and I - were sitting around her bed talking. She was pretty out of it and was asleep... or so we thought. My sister is a renowned artists and dresses pretty crazy (if the goodwill bag is any indication) and my brother a pretty snappy dresser... me, other than my polyester and plaid I'm pretty much a jeans and tee guy, although I clean up pretty good! ;) So anyway my sis and bro are telling me while I'm out in California they are going to take me out and dress me up a bit... and they are giggling and I'm just taking it and smiling. Finally I've had enough and I say, "Hell sis you really think I'm going to let you dress me? The last time I did that I was the freaking goodwill bag!" The moment I said that my mom burst into uncontrolled laughter, bless her heart! And we all looked at each other, thinking she was either asleep or unconscious, and we started to laugh with her. Anyway... it was pretty cool that even under those circumstances, we, especially my mom, could enjoy a good laugh. I'll never forget that.

And yes... I think we need to start such a thread... although I'm afraid that this might not be my most embarrassing moment! LMAO

[tacochuck]

You do clean up well Fred! lol

[chrispps]

Originally Posted by twnpnds

OMG that is hilarious! LMAO!!! Thanks Fred. Hmmm, maybe we should have a "my most embarrassing moment" thread.

Don't think that would be good, i think most ppls most embarrassing moments cant be talked about here.

[stonecold]

Fred, it's great to know that you had that wonderful moment with your mother and siblings...what a precious memory! Thanks for sharing that.
Oh, and by the way, I remember reading the Goodwill story here last year and it gets funnier every time I read it. lmao

stonecold added 1 Minutes and 28 Seconds later...

Originally Posted by tacochuck

You do clean up well Fred! lol

That's awesome tacochuck! He sure did age fast! lmao

[johnsbakker1]

Originally Posted by Fred Garvin

He he he... thanks... I think! LMAO

I have to tell you... when my mother was on her death bed, she was starving herself due to a terminal illness and we - my sister, brother, and I - were sitting around her bed talking. She was pretty out of it and was asleep... or so we thought. My sister is a renowned artists and dresses pretty crazy (if the goodwill bag is any indication) and my brother a pretty snappy dresser... me, other than my polyester and plaid I'm pretty much a jeans and tee guy, although I clean up pretty good! ;) So anyway my sis and bro are telling me while I'm out in California they are going to take me out and dress me up a bit... and they are giggling and I'm just taking it and smiling. Finally I've had enough and I say, "Hell sis you really think I'm going to let you dress me? The last time I did that I was the freaking goodwill bag!" The moment I said that my mom burst into uncontrolled laughter, bless her heart! And we all looked at each other, thinking she was either asleep or unconscious, and we started to laugh with her. Anyway... it was pretty cool that even under those circumstances, we, especially my mom, could enjoy a good laugh. I'll never forget that.

And yes... I think we need to start such a thread... although I'm afraid that this might not be my most embarrassing moment! LMAO

fred, I gotta tell you the story is hilarious and the follow up brought tears to my eyes. You are very lucky to have such memories, thanks for sharing

[gooba]

Dido on that.

[Fred Garvin]

Thanks to all! I am blessed to have such memories... and am thankful I can share them here and just as blessed to have you all as my extended family and this site my home on the web!

Peace